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01-Jul-2020 22:00

Learn more about how Oath collects and uses data and how our partners collect and use data.Select ' OK' to allow Oath and our partners to use your data, or ' Manage options' to review our partners and your choices.I myself have heard from Black men especially some variation of the statement, "I want a daughter with good hair," meaning of course,"I refuse to date a Black woman because I don't want my daughter to have hair like mine." I actually had a college roommate (a black girl) who openly admitted to me that the reason she didn't date black men was because she wanted a daughter with "good, curly hair." Statements like that also include the fact that many Black men (and women) want lighter skinned children because they perceive dark skin as unattractive. Now, the question that I don't know the answer to is, "is it up to us to change how we choose to view these relationships or will those stigmas wither away when we no longer live under the cloud of white supremacy?Kodak Black semi-recently made a comment on an Instagram live stream that he didn't like Black girls, in a sexual way. "Because white women were taboo for black men for centuries in this country to the extent that black men could be lynched for the appearance of involvement with white women, access to white women may be more alluring for black men now."Another question that comes up is, "does he really love her? And we all know what they say about those who make assumptions." Many Black women can't help to think feel as though a great number of Black men choose to date outside of his race for superficial reasons. I'd imagine the great majority of interracial unions are solely based on true love because I couldn't imagine a relationship lasting on anything less than that, but even so, there are still stigmas in the Black community that we have placed on ourselves and interracial relationships.We also often see a similar reaction from Black men when they come across a Black woman in a relationship with a white man.So, if it's okay for other people to date outside of their race, why isn't it okay for Black people?

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It is something that hard to talk about and gravely misunderstood.

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I recently came across a Facebook post asking Black people what they thought of a cartoon image depicting a Black woman in a relationship with a white man. Even though I, personally, generally don't care about Black people dating interracially, I, as a Black woman, ABSOLUTELY saw where many of those people were coming from.

Initially, I thought it weird that someone would even ask a question like that, but after sifting through the comments, and I mean COMMENTS, it was clear that many people really did have thought-out and serious opinions about it. I imagine that if you were to ask a random Black person what they thought about interracial relationships in general, they'd say they were indifferent, but I think we've all noticed the *humpf* Black women often make when they come across a Black man in a relationship with a woman outside of his race.What's with the double standard and the disconnect?



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