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02-Nov-2019 17:08

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James Needham III- So you know how I just said it’s really dumb to use your first and last name? And to those people I say, “I hope you are not going on a job interview any time soon.” Notlookingforsluts- Oh hello, nice guy of Okcupid!

Thank god you made it clear in your username that you aren’t looking for a slut, because I was just about to message you and offer you my body.

David Silver/Say Anything- Nothing makes me weak in the knees like a casual reference to late 80s/early 90s pop culture. I usually get so excited I’ll message something CRAY like, “Meet me at the Max in 1 hour? ” or, “Diane Court here.” Bagel Meet Bagel- Surprise, surprise. A visit or message from Mark3456 or jbt78 or Cardinalsfan may not catch my eye as quickly as I_shot_the_Sheriff_forreal. Because honestly, what people say in their messages, and their profiles, is way more important than their username. We’ve already done a post or two on profiles and messages, but rest assured, readers!

There is enough material here to run a daily tumbler for eternity.

You know what we mean—you probably screenshotted them and sent them to your friends because you couldn't believe someone would choose it. Here, we have a list of their 10 favorites (yes, all actual usernames!

If you’re on Tinder or Bumble, you’ll need to use your real first name, but other sites and apps still let you create a username that defines your personality.

As I learn all too regularly, there is a fine line between being funny and just plain scary.