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The stunning models, all from rural backgrounds in Germany, stripped off for the Bavarian Girls Edition 2018 calendar.I knew that if I wanted to go for a sauna in Germany again, I’d have to get my kit off. The facilities here are great – far superior to what we have back home.But I think I’ll wait until I visit England where it is acceptable to keep your swimwear on and the awkward silences are broken up with pointless conversations about the weather. I keep my head down and find a spot in the sauna as far away from them as possible. I pretend to be super cool about this and lay my towel down to sit on.
His hairy, wrinkly little bum thrusts itself in my direction. Despite the snow, there’s a naked man out there too, pacing around, cooling down after his sauna. How strange would it be if you bumped into your old teacher in one of these things?
The terror begins as soon as you step into the changing room. To the left I see a group of naked, middle-aged men and women having what looks like a good old natter over each others’ bits and bobs. I strip down to my bikini and wrap my towel firmly around me. That’s a typical Bavarian greeting that means “greetings from God” “Hallo! Most of the women natterers are covering their modesty with dressing gowns now. I try not to stare or even look in their direction, instead focussing my sight on some pigeon holes where I can leave my now very redundant bikini. Plus I have to leave my towel outside unless I want it to get completely soaked. This is where people will actually see me properly naked. A man and woman are using the showers, so again, I find a spot as far away from them as possible, and shower fast, as if I’m paying 20 Euro per drip.